For several years, I took public transit to work everyday. There were months where I’d set my alarm to wake up at 4:30 in the morning to take 2 buses to work and two buses home. If it was windy or rainy, didn’t matter, I was out there at the bus stop waiting. I’d wake up with an upset stomach and just power through. Sometimes the route would run late and I’d miss my second bus and have to wait for the next one. I basically caught the earliest bus I could so that even if the bus was late, I’d arrive to work on time. I used to feel embarrassed and ashamed that was my only option at the time to get to work. Very few of my coworkers knew I took public transit because I thought they’d look down on me or pity me like I was a sad little puppy. Riding the bus was scary at times, especially as a single woman. I learned how to ride the bus and avoid unsafe or sketchy people. I learned to trust my gut and be street smart. I’d dress in clothes that were modest and unassuming and avoided eye contact as a way to protect myself. Along the way I met some Christian friends who I still am in contact with today(love you, Candice).
Looking back now, I don’t see this season of my life in a negative light. When I look back at my days of taking advantage of the opportunities the Lord gave me, It causes me to feel immense gratitude for the present. I feel grateful that God gave me the physical and mental ability to ride public transit safely. San Bernardino public transit is scary. There were people that would hang around the transit center prowling like lions looking for the vulnerable. I always had family I’d text when I got on the bus and when I arrived to my destination. My time on the bus became many a session of time with the Lord. I’d listen to worship songs and just pour my heart out to Him. Many times, He’d speak to me too and I’d listen. I no longer see someone who was a coward or a pitiful person but I see instead, a strong woman who took what she had and made the best of it.
Driven To Hope 